AcmeShorts

I mean Jesus Fucking Christ. I turn on the TV and I want to smash my face into the screen, rotate it 90 degrees, and pull it out again. “There’s no neutral ground between good and evil”. OK, George, whatever you say, go fuck your father up the ass. And then have him go and fuck his father up the ass. It will be a tri-generational butt fuck fest.
OK. That was angry. That's not productive, it's just venting.
So here are some pointers you should take note of:
1. You wouldn’t know what to do in a free market with a large shopping cart and an assembly line of professional Iraqi looters in tow.
2. You actually thought we were going to Iraq for Al Kay-duh and their nuk-yuh-ler weapons, didn't you, you little frigging hobbit.
3. That thing you do with your eyebrows isn't making you look like you have control of the situation, as you appear to assume. It makes you look like you're taking a shit.

Anyway, get back to me about the Kerry thing with the National committee.

~Dick

From the Desk of Richard F. Cheney, Vice President