AcmeShorts

“How many rocks do you have there,” Winslower Bumpercropolis asked the fellow in the green cap.

The fellow with the green cap opened up his sack and looked in. “Well, looks as if I got, say, I don’t quite know how many for sure, considering my limited counting skills. How many fingers in a hand again?”

“Give me that sack, you idiot!” Winslower Bumpercropolis snatched the sack and dumped its contents (two rocks) on the table. He put his glasses on. “Now let’s see. Who owes me a favor who knows how to count rocks?”
Date Written: March 16, 2004
Author: Ewan Snow
Average Vote: 4.46154
Comments:
03/19/2004 Jon Matza (4): Simple, elegant, made me laugh. Almost a five.
03/19/2004 scoop: Who owes me a favor who knows how to count stars?
03/19/2004 scoop (5): Anyhow, this many!
03/19/2004 Will Disney (4): ha
03/19/2004 Benny Maniacs (4): Deplorable. Undercuts the nobility of mankind. Funny though.
03/19/2004 Jimson S. Sorghum (5): Ditto Matza.
03/19/2004 Dylan Danko (5): Good all around but especially the very funny Bumpercropolis.
03/19/2004 Will Disney: yeah that name is super.
03/19/2004 Mr. Pony (4): "Winslower" was the one that made me laugh.
03/19/2004 Craig Lewis: Streamlined.
03/19/2004 Craig Lewis (4):
03/19/2004 qualcomm (4): i praise this short because it is praiseworthy.
03/19/2004 senator (5): Great short.
03/19/2004 Jimson S. Sorghum: Agreed about 'Bumpercropolis.' Benny, I think you spelt "adorable" wrong.
03/21/2004 Jon Matza: Jimson: to me your comment below has become synonymous with crushing disappointment. While I have nothing against its substance, each time I've checked the site this weekend it's the first thing I've seen - and it seems to be mocking me, gloating over the fact that there's no new material (even if this isn't strictly true). What do you have to say in your defense?
03/21/2004 annebot (4): so cute, good short. just ignore matza, he hasn't gotten any since that trip to mexico in '98
03/22/2004 Jon Matza: Annebot: you should stick to making dubious claims about your tits and ass and one-starring my shorts. When you try to contribute to the actual discourse, innocent jokes get murdered.
03/22/2004 Dylan Danko: Hmm, I think someone's in love.
03/22/2004 Jon Matza: Yeah? Which asshole are you talking about?
03/22/2004 Dylan Danko: This asshole.
03/22/2004 Jon Matza: You're right..."methinks" (to quote annebot) those two would make beautiful music together.
03/22/2004 Dylan Danko: I don't know. I think that guy "plays the recorder," if you know what I mean.
03/22/2004 Jimson S. Sorghum: Matza: re:"crushing disappointment." As my father used to say "If the foo shits."
12/15/2004 TheBuyer (5): good author pick, Mr. Snow!
12/15/2004 Pale Male: This one hasn't worn that well.
12/15/2004 Pale Male: My real name is Buteo Jamaicensis.
04/16/2006 Master Bates (5):