AcmeShorts

McWilliamsburg

You have no idea how close to disaster we came. It was literally the beginning of the end for us, our darkest day, and, at the last moment, we were saved. We were at the brink of despair, leaning over the precipice of doom, and right before falling off the edge we were yanked back to safety. This is what happened:


THEY ALMOST BUILT A STARBUCKS HERE.


Yes, that's right. Let me repeat:


THEY ALMOST BUILT A MOTHER-FUCKING STARBUCKS HERE, RIGHT ON BEDFORD, DIRECTLY ACROSS FROM THE VERB CAFE.

I don't know the details, but for whatever reason, just when they were about to sign the papers, they decided against it. But they were close. Following their standard corporate model, they were planning to position themselves across from the competition (which usually means a small, independently owned business), assuming that their familiar tasting coffee and frappucinos and color scheme and branding would be so welcomed in this chaotic, frenzied world that everyone would flock to them, thus shutting down the little guy/ma and pa store, in yet another victory for franchises, for conformity, for sameness.

That's it in a fucking nutshell. Time for me to head back to my loft-space.