Feedbag Jefferson spent the night guzzling Dr. Pepper and stealing credit card numbers with a telescope from tenants of the high rise a couple blocks away. The lights in his apartment were off and the comic rock of Weird Al Yankovick was in heavy rotation on the Hi-Fi. Feedbag cranked the focus on the 9x50 finder scope and a curvy redhead came into view: third floor, north wing. Bingo! He’d been waiting to rip her digits for a week. He panned, trying to find her desk, her wallet, any clue that she might finally flash some number, but it turned out she wasn’t in her office, but her bedroom. Screwed again. The needle scratched as “Eat It” finished. Feedbag flipped the LP and put down his notepad. He’d only transcribed one credit card number tonight; he was slipping. He looked back into the scope and felt a certain thickness in his loins. Maybe it was worth it. Maybe it was worth it.
Date Written: May 14, 2003 Author:Ewan Snow Average Vote: 3.85714
Comments:
05/15/2003Will Disney (4): these two most recent shorts by ewan seem to reflect some kind of mild psychosis, or at the very least, emotional retardation.
04/7/2005John Slocum (3): RALLY, RALLY,RALLY,RALLY,RALLY,RALLY,RALLY,RALLY!!! I like this one but feel it lacked something, something nebulous, something I can't exactly put my finger on.
04/7/2005Ewan Snow: YOU CAN'T PUT YOUR FINGER ON IT BECAUSE YOUR FINGERS ARE STUCK UP YOUR ASS!!!!!!!!!
04/7/2005John Slocum: ONLY TWO OF THEM.
04/7/2005Ewan Snow: same hand or different?
04/7/2005John Slocum: SAME
04/12/2005John Slocum: Hey everyone, it's the Feedbag Jefferson short again. It's here again because any 2 out of you 10000 people who could drop a rating on this aren't rallying. Keep it up and we'll get to see this again next week. Nothing wrong with that, but perhaps some more people could RALLY.
04/12/2005TheBuyer (4): duty 4.
04/12/2005Litcube (4): Actually, this is a good one.
04/12/2005TheBuyer: which is why it's a duty FOUR...god, stop hitting me.
04/12/2005John Slocum: Thank you, gentlemen of Canada.
04/14/2005John Slocum: ???!!!???
04/14/2005John Slocum: HEY QUALCOMM, WHADDAYATHINKA THIS ONE?
04/15/2005John Slocum: Hey, Disney: this is getting to be a touch embarrassing. Matza! Opportunity to insult Disney.
04/15/2005Jon Matza: Disney, how about installing this as the permanent historical short? Then we won't have to bother reading or rating other ones.
04/15/2005John Slocum: Ouch!
04/15/2005Will Disney: okay okay i'll fix that feature!!!
04/15/2005John Slocum: HOORAY!!!
04/19/2005John Slocum: Hooray?
04/19/2005John Slocum: Disney: Nice job fixing this feature.
04/19/2005Jon Matza: I found some subtletites I missed the 11th time I read this. Thanks Disney!
04/19/2005John Slocum: I found some stalagtites the 24th time around.
04/21/2005TheBuyer: Perfect, I haven't read this yet.
04/21/2005John Slocum: HaHaHaHa, very funny, Disney.
04/26/2005John Slocum: Goodness. I can scarcely believe how embarrassing this is.
04/26/2005Jon Matza: Disney: you have betrayed me for the second to last time.
04/26/2005Mr. Joshua: Hey Ewan: Do the credit card numbers have a telescope? Huh?
04/28/2005Ewan Snow: "eating chicken with a fork"
04/28/2005TheBuyer: I'll read it tomorrow BACK OFF ALREADY.