AcmeShorts

I fuck the girls you see in magazines. That’s right, I fuck um good. Envy me if you want but it’s no big deal, you can fuck um too, though I doubt you want my sloppy seconds. Get your own magazine girls and fuck um good. Here’s how I get mine: first I go to a magazine store, that’s where they hang out, and I slowly peruse the gallery. I like girls who make eye contact; it means they’re into me. When I see one I like I pick her up, often I’ll pick up a few (These magazine girls tend to lose my interest fast so it helps to have a few) and take um home. When I get home I lay my lovelies out on the bed, magazine girls are so easy, no dinner required, and I decide which one is gonna get it first. This morning I’m feeling extra naughty so I choose Janet, you’ve probably seen her on the cover of this June’s issue of Woman’s Day. Janet looks conservative but she is horny and wants the cock. I put the other ladies away for later, no need to make them jealous, and I do a slow strip tease for lucky Ms. Janet Something. “Do I make you horny baby?” She can’t take her eyes off me. Once I am in a state of nature I begin my foreplay. To be polite I often start with a light fingering, read the table of contents. It doesn’t take much to get these girls wet, a flick of the tongue is often enough. Within seconds my soldier has risen and moments later I have whipped him into a frenzy. I fight release as long as possible but I am a poor warrior, ejaculation comes quickly. I drip the precious life juice on my magazine girls’ perfect form as she smiles, taking pleasure in my pleasure. I wipe aside the morning dew and kiss her softly as her smooth skin begins to ripple and prune, perhaps from the sweat of lovemaking or perhaps from absorbing the precious life juice. Drained I grow tired and put my lover aside. Later I will recycle her, abandoning her in some random bathroom or dentist office. There she will sit and wait for other lovers but none will love her with the care and reverence that I do. I fuck the girls you see in magazines. That’s right, I fuck um good.