AcmeShorts

He used to live under the subway. He liked it down there. You would walk down to the end of the track and go down some stairs and walk a little bit along the tunnel and then there would be a room off to the side and that’s where he kept his stuff – his dirty blanket and his bag of goodies – this moleman.

He caught a rat one day and ate it ‘as is’. He had managed to hit the thing over the head with a rock.

He also knew this one spot where he could look up through a grate and look up skirts as the ladies walked by. He would sit down there and take care of himself. Every once in a while they would look down and see him.

Date Written: February 27, 2003
Author: Will Disney
Average Vote: 4.5
Comments:
02/27/2003 anonymous (5):
02/13/2004 scoop (5): Man, that's a great ending.
03/10/2004 Mr. Pony (4): Yes, hats off to the author for not trying to take it further.
03/27/2004 Ewan Snow (5): I don't think I ever read this one. It's excellent.
03/28/2004 qualcomm: why do you guys like this one??
03/28/2004 Ewan Snow: You know, I'm really not sure. I read it last night and couldn't stop giggling, but I wasn't exactly, uh, sober... Upon re-reading it this morning, it doesn't seem as great. I do remember liking the expression "take care of himself" and 'as is.'
03/28/2004 scoop: What Snow said about those two phrases, but also there is a deliberate anti-punch line qulaity to it that I like. That last line is discordant and it makes it funny in an anti-funny kind of way, I think.
03/28/2004 Mr. Pony: I just laugh a lot.
03/28/2004 qualcomm: bullshit.
03/28/2004 scoop: Hey The Lerpa I can't tell whether you like it or not because you haven't voted so I have no context with which to place your comments. IF you could attend to this matter it would be beneficial for all parties concerned.
03/28/2004 qualcomm: i tried to give it a two but was told i voted already. must have given it a three way back when.
03/28/2004 scoop: Why is The Lerpa being so Lerpaish about this short?
03/28/2004 qualcomm: it's no good. and certainly not a five, as you two lerpas have voted.
03/28/2004 scoop: There's no call for invoking the lowere case "l" in your use of lerpa, The Lerpa. Your Lerpation on this issue I find Lerpaesque and dangerously Lerpaish, in a troubling Lerpa-like way.
03/28/2004 qualcomm: ssssssss
03/28/2004 scoop: Unparalelled Lerpalogical Lerpaciousness by The Lerpa. I call Lerpa!
03/28/2004 Mr. Pony: So you voted a three earlier, but were ready to give it a two this morning. Were you in error then, or now?
03/28/2004 Mr. Pony: [Zing!]
05/25/2004 TheBuyer (4): Disney is like Santa: he's sees me when I'm sleeping, he knows when Im awake, he knows when I've been looking up through grate, havin a sneaky.