AcmeShorts

I remember it well.
Death was handjobbing me in the middle of a chinese dump on Canal. His hands were sticky from pork buns and as he pumped my charleston chew I looked into his eyes to get some sense of the person. He was certainly overtired. I told him to spit on his palms and turned back to my lo mein. That seemed to do the trick. By now the chinks were squaking away and I stood up, grabbed him by the head and pushed his cheeks in, forcing his mouth open. In seconds I managed to caulk the gaps in his rotted teeth. I cupped his chin and forced his mouth shut. We caught each other's eyes and I nodded with approval as his adams apple bobbed like a fishing float.

"A penny for your thoughts," I taunted with that sardonic wit I'm well known for. He looked flushed.
"Well, I'm off." I nodded at the chinks who were still chinking away and dropped a ten on the table.
"B-b-but we had a deal!"
"Yeah, right."
"But I let you come in my mouth."
I turned back to his still kneeling figure and my anger surprised me. "No! I let you let me come in your mouth! DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE??" He shook.
I turned away in disgust. "You used to be my hero and now..."
"Fuck you!" he sputtered.

Without looking back I stepped out on the street. It was a beautiful day. Life, strangely enough, meant no more or no less than it ever had.

Date Written: November 5, 2004
Author: Dylan Danko
Average Vote: 4
Comments:
11/15/2004 The Rid: Based on how many stories I've written about cum, you think I'd like this better.
11/15/2004 Will Disney (4): it's not funny but i don't know, i'm going out on a limb here...
11/15/2004 Dick Vomit: Sure is a whole lotta "chink" goin' on.
11/15/2004 Mr. Pony (4): I think this is pretty good!
11/15/2004 anonymous: Of course it is, Mr. Pony.
11/15/2004 The Rid: The word "chinks" could be affectionate, like Pacino in Glengarry Glen Ross. Or the author could be a bigot.
11/15/2004 TheBuyer (4): Massively chinky
11/15/2004 Litcube (4): I think this is pretty good!
11/15/2004 The Rid (3): There's something this short that's really off-putting. That said, the idea of "I let you let me come in your mouth" is gravy.
11/15/2004 qualcomm (4):
11/15/2004 anonymous: Explain yourself, Ridster.
11/15/2004 The Rid: Well, maybe off-putting is too much. The short didn't grab me on the whole. But like I said, I like "No! I let you let me come in your mouth! DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE??" That brings it up to a 3.48 instead of a 2.46, ya know?
11/15/2004 TheBuyer: Hey Rid, how come you'd peg the author as a bigot?
11/15/2004 The Rid: I wouldn't. I was joking. I should have added after my comment, "Wink."
11/15/2004 TheBuyer: Oh. I would.
11/15/2004 The Rid: The way I look at it, I can't really pass judgment on anything but the short itself, considering I don't know any of you personally and therefore have no idea what motivates your shorts.
11/15/2004 Mr. Pony: For future reference, my shorts all well up from the same spring of my great and sincere love of all humanity, and should be considered accordingly.
11/15/2004 The Rid: Pony: Noted.
11/15/2004 Ewan Snow (5): You dumb asses. This is funny. Anybody who has that kind of relationship with Death is okay in my book. And "Charlston Chew" is family-pack.
11/15/2004 Jon Matza: "His hands were sticky from pork buns" is pretty malted, too. Also that he's eating lo mein while being 'serviced'. Four? Five?
11/15/2004 anonymous: Thank you, Snow.
11/15/2004 qualcomm: shut up
11/15/2004 anonymous: sorry qc.
11/19/2004 John Slocum (4): This guy is gross.