AcmeShorts

Ingrid peeled her fat ass off the couch when the buzzer went.

"Hello,"

"Pizza"

"Third floor no elevator"

She made herself feel sexier by centering her Mickey Mouse clamdiggers, and doing a quick hand-to-crotch-sniff-test, while she puffed her greasy bangs.

She pulled the door open and prepared to flirt. She forced a coquettish half smile, arranged her saggy tits into what she privately thought of as, "showing off her girls" and waited.

Farsad pulled the front door open and hauled his chain-smoking, emaciated self up the stairs. He stopped at the fire-door on the third floor to catch his breath and wiggle his pecker into what he privately thought of as, "showing off his package." He twisted his cap to rogueish angle and strode into the hallway.

Both were profoundly disappointed.
Date Written: May 21, 2004
Author: TheBuyer
Average Vote: 4
Comments:
05/28/2004 Ferucio P. Chhretan (3): Eh.
05/28/2004 John Slocum (4): excellent!
05/28/2004 Cooper Green: Yes it is, Mr. Slocum, I enjoyed this too. Hope, disappointment and two toppings, all in one brief short. I have never encountered "Mick(e)y Mouse clamdiggers" before, but whatever they are, they sound like they belong here.
05/28/2004 Cooper Green (4):
05/28/2004 qualcomm (4):
05/28/2004 Dylan Danko (4): Pretty Good
05/28/2004 Jimson S. Sorghum: "Clamdiggers" are similar to capris. Cropped pants. What one might wear in anticipation of a flood.
05/28/2004 anonymous: See also: spandex, inappropriate use of
05/28/2004 Mr. Joshua (4): I felt like this coulda been a 5, but it was just missing something at the end.
05/28/2004 anonymous: typo corrected w/ props to cooper
05/28/2004 Pix (4): Although there was no mention of Camel Toe, it would have been a good parallel to Farsads package.
05/28/2004 John Slocum: Pix: a better parallel than the tits thing?
05/28/2004 Pix: Yeah John...
05/29/2004 Mr. Pony (4):
05/29/2004 scoop (4):
05/30/2004 Benny Maniacs (4): Those racist dicks.
05/30/2004 Jon Matza (4):
05/31/2004 Phony Millions (4): Unashamedly contemptful of its characters!
04/8/2005 Litcube (5): F all you. Highly plausible and logical details, funny. I laughed. Not docking for strange punctuation during first few paragraphs. 4.78.
04/8/2005 Litcube: arranged her saggy tits into what she privately thought of as, "showing off her girls"
04/8/2005 Dick Vomit (4): I work with this bitch.